There are few things more difficult in life than when a child dies. It raises so many questions about life and death in the hearts and minds of those who are affected by the loss of the child.
What happens to children when they die?
Where do they go?
And many more.
Communicating with many children in the afterlife has been one of the most heartwarming, beautiful and uplifting things I have ever done. It has also been a great honor to be able to bring some comfort to parents who are grieving the loss of their little one.
In fact, when I was just starting out on my journey as a medium I attracted so many deceased children, especially sons, that I started to wonder if I would ever talk with any other kind of spirit. I eventually realized this was for a very good reason. I am the mother of two sons and very rooted in my maternal nature. (I tend to mother any kid that is within a 100 foot radius...) These boys, attracted by my highly developed maternal side, knew that I was the right medium for them to connect with to bring messages to their grieving parents and loved ones.
Because of my many experiences bringing through messages from children I have also learned a few things about what goes on for them in the afterlife.
What have they taught me?
Miscarriages, abortions, still births:
Children who cross over before they have been born are usually very wise, older souls who were never actually meant to experience a full life on the earth. This is for several reasons. Being old souls they require only a very brief time in order to progress spiritually themselves, doing so even before they are actually born. They are also providing an experience, the loss of a child before birth, in service to their parents. They have agreed to serve the parents in this way so that they, the parents, can use the experience of grief and loss to grow spiritually. It has all been figured out ahead of time. Though it may not seem like it these children are actually giving their parents an incredible gift.
In my experience as a medium these children fully cross over immediately. There is no pussy footing around here on earth as a ghost or an earth bound spirit. They move right into the spirit world and often act as a kind of spirit guide for their parents. They can do this because they are such old souls they have a great deal of wisdom and guidance to share. I have found that once the parents know this they are able to reframe the loss into a much more positive viewpoint which helps them open more fully to their child's guidance and deepen their relationship with their child in the spirit world.
Sometimes, these spirits are with a deceased relative or two on the other side, but this tends to be rare thing in my experience. Being very wise and old souls they are not in need of the kind of care and attention that infants and small children are upon their entry into the spirit world.
Infants and small children:
Upon transition infants and small children are met with oodles of love by their ancestors in the spirit world. These can be grandparents, aunts, uncles, great grandparents. The ancestors pull out all the stops and tend to show up en mass to greet the little child. The child is also lovingly accompanied by her spirit guides, who are there every step of the way as she transitions. I have been overwhelmed with emotion many times during readings when I discover how wonderfully cared for the little ones are by the spirit's of those who love them. Their guides and relatives also help them to communicate through a medium with their parents and other loved ones who are still in the physical world.
Regardless of how traumatic the event that lead to the passing, crossing over is usually smooth and easy for the child. During one of my readings a little three year old girl who, sadly, had been kidnapped and murdered came through. Her parents, understandably in incredible pain about this event, were desperate to know if her transition was painful or difficult for her. She smiled and shook her head 'No' then showed me that she had simply closed her eyes, turned her head to the left, then opened her eyes to find herself surrounded by many loving spirit relatives and her grandfather, who took her by the hand and helped her cross over.
I frequently get asked if children continue to grow up in the spirit world. The answer is yes, children do continue to grow during their time in spirit. The soul's journey continues on after we have left the physical world and that journey is all about growth. I have done a number of readings where a small child, who, for example, died eight years ago at the age of four comes through in the reading as a teenager. It is very moving when the parents get a chance to see how much their little one has grown as she progresses on in her spirit journey.
Sometimes a child for one reason or another, does not fully transition and becomes an earth bound spirit or a ghost. This usually coincides with a death that happened very quickly or came as a huge a surprise, a death that was particularly traumatic or when the parents are experiencing an incredible amount of grief and are having a hard time letting the child go. It can also happen when the life of the child was particularly difficult or traumatic.
Earthbound spirit children will continue to stay in the house in which they lived, sometimes even long after the parents have moved on, or remain at the location of their passing, for example an accident scene. They sometimes hang out in places that they think are fun (parks, arcades, favorite play spots) or to which they are attracted by someone whose energy they can draw on such as a younger person who they look up to or who does things they are interested in. They can be a quiet presence or sometimes even cause some degree of mischief. These children don't realize that they have not fully transitioned and will often try to play with the physical children in the space. Children that see or have imaginary friends are sometimes seeing and playing with these earthbound spirit children.
Once an earthbound spirit child is discovered it is best to help them, or have a medium help them, to fully transition into the spirit world. This way they can make long awaited connections with their loved ones in spirit and continue on their journey in the spirit world. When they remain earthbound, they are stuck and unable to move forward on their spiritual journey.
Here is a blog post about one experience I had with an earthbound child spirit.
Older children and teens:
Older children and teens are also met by loved ones in the spirit world, including ancestors, friends and other people they've known and even animals and pets they have been close to, while alive, who have passed.
I have also found that older children and teenagers are very eager to let their parents know that they are ok in the after life and will even go to great lengths to get the attention of a medium who can convey this message, (which has happened with me a good number of times). They definitely take their youthful enthusiasm and persistence into the spirit world with them! They are also keen to help their parents understand their death in the deeper context of their soul journey, in hopes that this will help the parents' through the grieving process. I have found that their messages while being very caring are also quite direct and inspirational.
That's my experience with children in the spirit world.
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Hi, I'm Clare...
...and I'm a mentor whose passion is helping budding mediums go from feeling weird, worried and overwhelmed to feeling “wow this is so damn cool!”
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