Consider with me now these three scenarios:
#1: It's Tuesday 9 am. You've got a 1:1 mediumship reading with a client scheduled for 2 pm. You start feeling tired and listless and are strongly considering canceling the reading because of this. You hum and haw. And haw and hum. You end up canceling because, hey... you're not feeling up to it...
#2: You're on your way out the door to a public mediumship demonstration at which you'll be a part of a group of mediums delivering messages from spirit. All of a sudden you get a headache. "Oh dear" you think "Why am I feeling this way? Is spirit trying to tell me something?" You succumb to the headache, stay home, put your feet up and watch re-runs of The Gilmore Girls. Your headache goes away very quickly, thank goodness.
#3: Your mediumship readings are usually just fine however you had a difficult client yesterday and it felt more like pulling teeth than being with spirit. You consider clearing your reading schedule for the rest of the week. Or maybe the whole month...
Has a similar version of any of these situations ever happen to you...?
What's going on here?
Are you being guided by spirit? Your guides?
Or are you experiencing PSF?
PSF is my short form for Psychic Stage Fright.
Every psychic and medium, whether she is new to exploring her abilities or is a seasoned professional who has done thousands of readings during her career experiences PSF in some way, shape or form at some time or another.
And... even though they experience it - some even quite often - many seasoned psychic mediums won't even talk about it. As if it would diminish them or make them look bad to other developing mediums in some way.
So... today, I' going to talk about it.
Because it's something that all of us psychics and mediums need to deal with on our journey and in our work. And the more we know how to identify PSF and understand how and why it comes up the better able we are to deal with it.
PSF is fear that primarily manifests itself in the form of resistance. And it can be a tough one to get a handle on.
Sometimes you'll just know that you're feeling fearful around giving a reading and be able to address that head on.
Other times PSF will be disguised as a kind of resistance that you'll easily be able to rationalize and justify as a feeling or urge or even as possible guidance from spirit that you think you should act on and not do, say, a particular reading or demonstration event or see a certain client.
PSF will often, but not always, manifest on the heels of a particularly difficult reading or mediumship demonstration or after having received a negative or critical comment from a client during or after a reading you've done for them.
It often coincides with actions you are taking such as going out into the world to live in your truth as a psychic medium, deciding to go pro, or even choosing to raise the rates that you charge for your readings. Actions that have you stepping out and forward on your path as a psychic and medium.
It is usually PSF simmering beneath surface actions like canceling readings or not showing up at a mediumship demonstration. PSF can be so unconscious that you don't even realize that you are actually acting out of PSF.
How , then, do you recognize that you might be experiencing PSF?
Here are seven fairly common signs:
1. You feel too tired or busy or disgruntled or unable to help or deal with people and find yourself canceling, rescheduling or avoiding doing readings altogether.
2. You think you are inadequate, not skilled enough or unprepared as a psychic or medium. You think that you need to keep bumping up and improving your abilities before you can go out there and 'perform'. This usually means going to lots and lots of classes and workshops to get better at mediumship but still thinking you are not good enough to sit with clients to do actual readings.
3. You question whether you are even psychic or able to connect with spirit. This usually ramps up just prior to scheduled readings or demonstrations, or just after your readings.
4. You fear things like: not getting anything during a reading; cheating your client because you are charging money; that you'll be wrong with what you see; or even that you're doing something you probably shouldn't be doing altogether by doing psychic or mediumship readings.
5. You avoid soliciting readings or calling back or responding to people who are interested in having a reading with you.
6. You find yourself apologizing for what you are seeing during a reading, holding back what you are getting out of fear of being wrong or facing disapproval from your client, asking your client too many questions and / or asking or for too much feedback or validation during your readings.
7. You find yourself post-reading obsessing about how you did, how you should have done things differently, feeling fearful about doing more readings and / or even thinking you were so incapable that your should give your client her money back.
Having even one of the above signs means that, yes, you are experiencing PSF.
See what I mean when I say that we ALL get PSF???
As with most things in life PSF has a spectrum and the signs described above will be different for each psychic medium ranging from low to high on that spectrum.
PSF is often accompanied by negative thoughts that will morph into excuses and justifications for your actions - or inactions - that seem quite logical and well thought out at the time. You will feel quite justified caving into your PSF even rationalizing it as being guided by spirit or your guides. Or that you really ARE tired, not feeling well, unskilled, not very psychic etc. etc...
How do you get a handle on PSF?
Greet that bugaboo PSF with love and understanding.
Know that it can rear its (ugly) head before, during and even after readings. Just about any time really.
Rather than trying to side step or rationalize it recognize this basic truth: that resistance to your gifts and doing readings and demonstrations is usually cyclical and, well... never ending. You don't really ever get over it. Basically you will always be dealing with it in one form or another or to one degree or another. That's normal, natural and totally OK!
Just like stage fright for a seasoned Broadway actor it's an integral part of what you have chosen to do as a psychic medium.
And know that...
There is only ONE way to deal with it.
Yup. Only ONE way! And that is...
...don't let it stop you! Work through PSF by doing another reading as quickly as you can. Ultimately pushing yourself through the fear and resistance by continuing to move forward is the only way to deal with PSF.
You can fall down into the mud, never get out and continue to find excuses not to do your readings or platform demonstrations or you can recognize the PSF cycle and keep going forward through the fear and resistance.
Ok, Clare - I can hear you saying - sometimes I might actually feel sick and tired or unable to do my best in a reading or for a client. I might not even want to work with a particular client. How do I know the difference between this and PSF?
Yes... every now and then you genuinely will not feel up to doing a reading or demonstration. But this is a rare thing. If you can see, by looking honestly at yourself, a pattern of behavior of canceling readings or feeling fussy about who you work with, or any of the things I have mentioned above, then you are dealing with PSF. No doubt about it in my books.
Oh and... another reason that you may find yourself often not wanting to work with certain clients is likely because you are not communicating clearly who you are and what it is you do and therefore are frequently attracting the wrong type of client for you. I'll leave that there for now for you to reflect on what that might mean for you and will write a future blog post on this topic. :)
Another way to identify your resistance over a rational, well made choice is to consider how you initially felt when you decided to do the appointment or demonstration. Were you feeling good about it overall? Then did you start to drag your feet a day or two or hours before the reading. If so.... PSF. Push through. You'll be glad you did.
Here is the way that I deal with PSF:
I immediately tune into the reading or demonstration request to get my very first impression. If it's a yes I trust that and go with it. And I stay with it. I push through any PSF that may come up prior to the reading or event and just do it. And everything is always fine!
And if things don't go well which is next to never in my experience, then I consider that there is something for me in it that I was meant to experience on my journey. Sometimes you've gotta have some poopy experiences in order to stretch, learn and grow.
The same is true when I tune in to a reading request and sense that this is not the reading, session or client for me. I totally honor that information, pass on that reading and move on. You don't have to accept every reading request that is made of you, either. Centering yourself and using your skills will help you greatly with this decision. Also, as I've already mentioned, being really clear with how you describe your services and not being wishy washy about who you are and what you do will help you a great deal with this, too.
So whether your PSF shows up:
...do yourself, your gifts and your abilities the honor of pushing through.
Make the choice to smile and bear a very natural part of being a psychic medium and continue forward ho! Say to yourself (and the world!) "I may feel afraid, but I'm going to keep going!"
Push past your fear, get more readings under your belt, keep honing your skills and your confidence will grow!
That's your ass kicking for today with lots of love from me...!
Hi, I'm Clare...
...and I'm a mentor whose passion is helping budding mediums go from feeling weird, worried and overwhelmed to feeling “wow this is so damn cool!”
I write helpful (so I’m told), no holds barred, BS free articles, share guided meditations, coach and lovingly kickass here at claremcnaul.com.
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